Today’s post comes from the mail bag. By the way, if you are one of the lovely people who have written in and you haven’t gotten a response yet I promise I’m getting to you. It generally means you’re getting a long response I plan on posting rather than a short and sweet answer. Please keep writing in and have some patience with me.

Auz,
I guess I have a sort of question, but it’s kind of rambly and behind a story. I don’t know if you read or follow my blog at all, if you don’t, here is the lowdown: for the past year or so, my boyfriend has been the guild leader of a very fun and active guild of some 200 people. We are a dual roleplaying/entry-level raiding guild, do Kara runs, etc.

Anyways, a few weeks back the boyfriend basically effectively quit WoW and gave Guild Leadership to me. I feel very overwhelmed. I have never really been a “leader” sort of person and suddenly being presented with having all these decisions and people asking me to make decisions, is very hard. I’ve had to scale back the guild because having two different focuses was just too hard: at this point I’ve scaled back on the all-guild raiding and now we’re sorta raiding with other guilds. This is just because first and foremost we are a casual/RP guild at heart, and we all hang out together because we are *friends* (as opposed to because we want to raid– as much as we love to do that, too.)

I have a lot of great support in the forms of my officers– heck you may be pleased to know that the my two second-in-commands are both chicks as well as me and they are very supportive and offer a lot of help. Still, I can’t help but be overwhelmed by the stress and I often feel that I bring nothing to the table as a GM– people tell me an idea, and I don’t know how to approach the idea because I am bad at making decisions so I usually just approve it right off the bat. I don’t think this will be good in the long run.

In short, I guess I am asking… what does one do when a guild falls into one’s lap? And is it possible that some people are simply not cut out for this job? I worry I may not be. I can teach and I can write, but I just have never envisioned myself as a leader. I don’t want to be the downfall of this wonderful guild that was sort of “given” to me.

-Pike (of Aspect of the Hare)

Through informal polling, namely talking to the people I’ve met in my online travels, I’ve determined that this kind of experience is the number one source of all new guild leaders. Guild leading is a huge time commitment and a lot of responsibility, and sometimes changes in real life or just burnout means a GM can’t make the commitment they used to and someone new has to take the reigns, often quite unexpectedly. This leaves the new GM perplexed and needing to get it together quickly. (Remind me later on I want to write about the importance of a succession plan.) It sounds like your question is broken into two parts; Am I doing it wrong? and Are there people not cut out for GMing?

Am I doing it wrong?

First - Your former GM chose your for a reason. Even disheartened GMs who burn out are protective of their guild. My co-GM and I joke that it’s our baby. (Which raises an eyebrow from Mr. Auzara who wasn’t aware I had a kid) Your GM likely knows more about the people in your guild than anyone else, and they picked you. That’s pretty strong evidence that you’re cut out for it. In this particular case, I’m willing to bet your boyfriend knows you very well, and knows your flaws and weaknesses as well as your strengths.

Second - You have something no one else does, access to the former GM. You can ask about how he was working to grow the guild, what he might do, etc. Clearly he doesn’t want the responsibility of full time GMing on his head or he wouldn’t have passed on the responsibility, but if you’re ever stuck he might be an excellent resource.

Third - Leadership is a team effort, I don’t believe anyone can do it alone. Even those who in name are sole leaders often spread tasks and responsibilities to other trusted members. It sounds like you have a team of great leaders with good ideas who respect you. Any new leader of an existing environment will need to identify your existing leaders and cultivate a working relationship with them. In addition, identify potential leaders from the membership and look to develop them.

Fourth -Develop your vision. You don’t have to come up with all the ideas by yourself or any of them to serve as a good leader. You steer the ship so to speak. Keep your eye on the horizon and keep your ear on your crew. It sounds like you have a solid idea of what your guild is at heart and what it’s members want. You could serve as a referee bouncing ideas off of you and making sure they are inline with where the crew wants to go.

Fifth - Define what you are willing to give. GMing will consume any and all time you chose to give it. There is always something else to do. Do yourself a favor and first define what time you can afford to give to the guild and then work to fit the things you have to accomplish into that time line.

Sixth - Find a mentor. As a new GM the best thing you can do is find an experienced GM who is willing to take you under their wing. Some things are common to GMing experiences and some skills are developed over time. If you can, find someone to bounce ideas off of and vent frustrations to. (<3Yeti, Tarsus and Lume!)

Seventh - I, a random internet stranger, cannot tell you if you’re doing it wrong, only your guild can. There are millions of different guilds out there all with different views “right” and “wrong.” Nin has come here and passionately argued with me that overruling a loot decision is “wrong,” while others have argued that it’s “right.” The fact is, it’s wrong for Nin and right for those that argued it’s right. What makes a good leader is ultimately decided by those you lead.
Are there people not cut out for GMing?

Yes, emphatically yes.

There are universal truths of GMing.

• You will spend more time focused on the game and the guild than if you were not leading.
• You will hear complaints.
• You will have to make tough decisions.
• You will be to blame when things go wrong.

A good GM needs tools to handle these things.

Time - You need the spare time to dedicate to leading. Lack of time is often what ends up causing GMs to have to resign. You also need strong time management skills so you can make the best use of the time you can dedicate to the game and to leading.

Complaints - You need a thick skin. Regardless of how well or how poorly your guild is doing people will have something to complain about. A good rule of thumb I use to measure the health of my guild is not how much complaining is there, instead it’s how petty are the complaints. If people are complaining about things like “He gave the turtle book he won to another mage and not me.” or “The loot I want hasn’t dropped in 6 months.” This is the sign of a healthy guild. If complaints run along the lines of “He called me a useless mage in guild chat.” or “I haven’t enjoyed a raid in 6 months.” This is the sign of a more serious problem. Good GMs learn to take these complaints and turn them into something positive. That being said, these complaints are the highest cause of GM burn out.

Tough Decisions - I’ve said before, you don’t have to have all the ideas to be the GM, but as GM the final call is left to you. You need to have a vision for your guild but that vision has to be tempered by the needs of the other people who share your guild. In many ways your job as GM is to take the needs of 40 or so individuals and mesh them together into one guild focus. This involved compromise on the parts of the members and awareness on the part of the GM. At some point you will make a decision that you know is bad for an individual you value, but is still right for the guild as a whole. It’s a tough call to make and every time I’ve had to make one like that I’ve hated it. It’s also what makes a strong GM.

The Blame Game - People like to assign blame and they rarely assign it to themselves. As GM you’ve signed off on every decision, therefore when something backfires guess who’s fault it is? You need to be able to accept accountability and you need to learn how to turn failure into triumph. I’ll give you an example from my days waitressing.

Once upon a time I was a waitress, I was good at my job and therefore was “rewarded” with twice the tables as a normal waitress. One day I screwed up. My table had ordered 20 minutes ago and I went to ask the cook where their food was. Ooops I never entered their order. FAIL! Fortunately the cook had a kind heart and put my order in with a rush. I quickly went to my table and said “I’m sorry, I’ve neglected to put your order in, it’s in now but it’ll still be about 10 minutes. I’d like to make it up to you with one of our readily available items to tide you over for free, what can I bring you?” The customers accepted my offer graciously and I brought them out salads (paid for out of my own pocket). 10 minutes later the cook had the food ready and I brought it out to them. I apologized again for my mistake and praised the cook for his quick response time. They got through their meal and I was very attentive to their needs (I’d just cost them 20 minutes it was the least I could do.) When they were leaving I noticed them talking to my boss. I was definitely in trouble. I cleared off their table and did my best to focus on my current customers. Having already screwed up once that day, I didn’t need any more angry customers talking to my boss. At the end of the night my boss called us around and read off a note the customer had left to me in front of everyone. Apparently rather than complain my customers were impressed that I’d taken responsibility for my mistake. They were also impressed that I offered them compensation and that I passed praise onto the cook. They left me a $40 tip, and my boss paid me back for the salads. My boss said something that I’m afraid I don’t remember and gave me the note and a raise. I keep that note with me even today as a reminder that it’s okay to screw up, as long as you take responsibility and work to fix it.

You will screw up. You’ve taken on too much responsibility to not mess up from time to time. What defines you as a leader won’t be your lack of screwing up, it will be the grace with which you recover from those mistakes.

That’s a quick and dirty introduction. It should be known that there are about a million things to learn and develop as an online leader. I’ve edited this post about 5 times and I still simultaneously think it is too long and too short. Thanks for your question Pike! I hope this helps you.